31 Days Journal: Day 13 Woes and Worries
Hmmm. The last 2 posts had been quite grave and honestly, I seem to be in an emotional low. They are not the most pleasant things to talk about. Safe to say, I am not depressed, just feeling down. By sheer coincidence, this post is about my current woes and worries.
First and foremost, I am now 25. I have been living comfortably single for all of those years. I’ve learnt to be independent and self reliant and I have been able to do many things that took my fancy. However, I do have to admit that it seems pathetic that I’ve not been able to romantically share life with anyone. Thing is, I have always been surrounded with friends. But now, the stark reality that I’m on my own is increasingly getting to me.
I know I am largely to blame for this because there have been people who have tried to reach out… and here comes the but. But, most of them were no strings attached relationships (I modestly decline most of them), incompatible individual preferences, too wide of an age gap and tragically long distance relationships.
I’ve tried dating apps and websites but I have had enough of sleazy messages and simple encounters. Conclusively, nothing beyond trailing messages or the quick gratification of the senses can be had from these. I’ve claimed my losses and stopped hedging bets (my time) on them.
Likewise, I’m not a club or bar guy. I drink, I dance (stupidly) and I like to talk and listen but those places have never been high on my places to spend my time in. Don’t get me wrong, I am not averse to these places.
So yes, there is that predicament. This is perhaps my biggest worry at the moment. Being alone is quite exhausting.
In my day to day life, my worries include:
- Playing the oboe – my TEQ and solos always makes me VERY anxious
- Where’s my keys, phone or wallet
- Do I have enough milk for porridge and tea?
- Did I feed my fish?
- My phone battery
- My MSc Dissertation ideas
Thankfully, these are quite mundane and trivial in the grand scheme of things. So there are plenty of things for me to celebrate and be grateful about. I just need to chill the hell down and channel the good things in life. You should too. 👍
[Update: 21 Feb 2014:] Here’s a link about 50 things you should be LESS worried about.